Day 885: Never Negotiate With the Food Table (Day 23 of 100)

Big event at work today, and it’s one of those events where there will be a speaker and “light refreshments provided,” which usually translates as mixed sandwiches, crackers and cheese, squares, and possibly a cake. A Food Table.

Sandwiches are my nemesis, as I think I’ve mentioned before. I don’t know why, exactly. I’m not a sandwich guy at home. I rarely make sandwiches and I don’t desire sandwiches in my routine life. But put me in front of a table of half-sandwiches made by somebody else, and it’s like a terrible switch flips in my brain. Sandwiches!

Texting with my wife (4 a.m. start, she was at work for 5), she asked why I don’t stick some snacks from this event in the Magic Bag, as that’s kind of the whole Magic Bag idea. After some reflection, I realized that it’s easier for me to avoid the Food Table than to negotiate with the Food Table.

Once I’m in a relationship with the Food Table, there’s a lot that can go wrong. I can crumble in the face of sandwiches. I can just kind of pile stuff on a plate absent-mindedly as I talk to somebody else. I can start doing that mental math-game calculus of well I did do twenty minutes of spin this morning so just one more…

Avoiding the food table, though, is a delight. Pure and simple. Just avoid the food table.

More importantly, don’t start playing the mental math game of what-counts-what-doesn’t-count, etc.

So yes. It’s going to take some willpower in the face of sandwiches, but there will be no Food Table negotiations on this day.